Everything that goes wrong, every irritation, gets a hotline right to your emotions. They all feel like great candidates to be the “last straw.”
And now this?
On top of everything else?!
Those words that you use as you place it on top of your heap, as you think about the injustice, the irony, the cruelty of “another” thing thrown at you.
Yes, I know about your heap, the pile of “things gone wrong.”
You didn’t make up those things, but you did organize the piles. Listen, don’t make piles out of these, not like this. Let each of these things stand alone. Don’t make them into a pattern, a trend, a message, a warning, a judgement.
Things will go wrong today, tomorrow. Bad things will happen. When they do, it does not mean what you fear it means, that all is lost, that you are beaten, that you are the punch line of some ontological joke.
If you want to gather things into piles, do it with good things. Every time something even mildly pleasant happens, put it together with all the other good things you can think of. Build a towering pile that you cannot ignore. Let piles like that form the skyline of your life.
These samples in the “For those who hurt” series are taken from a book to be released later this year.
The Other 167 Hours 
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May 30, 2013 at 12:18 pm
Cheryl Van Til
“If you want to gather things into piles, do it with good things. Every time something even mildly pleasant happens, put it together with all the other good things you can think of.”
It really works when a negative “what, me again?” thought pops into my head to acknowledge that there are other options and try to find something pleasant within the situation/pain.
Good post, Dr. Hamilton ~ thank you!!
May 30, 2013 at 6:23 pm
mshope69
Great suggestion, similar to focusing on gratitude. This is not easy and takes practice. When life was so active rearing children as a single parent, and working two jobs while living with some health issues, I kept going, not allowing myself to think about a life of being trampled on. I was very entrenched in being raised to please others and to always be kind no matter what. Now, after many surgeries, chronic pain, forced isolation due to pain, and then lack of family support and plenty of judgment and cruel comments, I tend to long to find comfort. I still am determined to be kind and follow Jesus and his ways. However, I am trying to learn to not allow myself to be trampled on and will at times stand up for myself when needed. Often, cruel comments come unexpected right after I have done something for someone or was very kind because I want to be that way. I am learning the world is going to be the way it’s going to be because each human is given free will to choose how they treat someone. I don’t have to take the abuse.
May 30, 2013 at 7:25 pm
David Hamilton
“It’s not easy and it takes practice”
True! It’s downright hard and can seem uphill all the way to break that habit. But it’s a battle we have fight. There’s no other way.
May 31, 2013 at 1:05 am
mshope69
Not having God’s Word right in front of me, I am reminded of the Apostle Paul suggesting in Philippians that we think on things that are good, pure and right. No one has to let what someone else does or says affect who we are, when we remember God loves us and nothing separates us from his love. He doesn’t give up on us. So, we can’t give up. It may be the narrow path, but it is the one that will work for now and always, if we don’t give up and let the world control our thoughts or beliefs about who we are in Christ. We have value, no matter who attempted to say anything different. My father and I, before his passing, had a strained relationship for he kept emotionally distant, and I so desired to please him. But the last decade of his life, we both worked to find a way to understand one another. He left 3 encouraging words to me that mean so much. He said, “Don’t ever give up. Keep a sense of humor, and don’t ever stop singing.” Any pile of rubbish of words wherein folks with their own issues try to discourage, can be kicked into oblivion if we keep focused on gratitude for all God has provided and remembering his unfathomable love for us, no matter how alone we may think we are. I would love to see a world where we all hug, smile and encourage one another, but I can be that person, and even when it hasn’t seemed to help, maybe it helped more than I know, so I can’t give up.
June 3, 2013 at 9:48 pm
themerchantsdaughter
where are three and four?
also, i like one and two.
June 4, 2013 at 8:52 am
David Hamilton
They and about 100 others are in the book.
Don’t want to give away the plot! :)
June 4, 2013 at 7:10 pm
themerchantsdaughter
sneaky.