Tired, depressed, or just don’t feel like it?
- Image by kevindooley via Flickr
You know those times when you don’t even feel like feeling like it?
“It” can be almost anything,
- getting out of bed,
- doing that household chore,
- going somewhere,
- seeing someone,
- talking,
- listening,
- making a decision,
- going to bed.
There are many ways the story can play out from there. There are lots of possible responses that may be okay, including just not doing “it.” Let’s assume you have come to the conclusion that you want to change your outlook on things. It’s like admitting that you’ve been taking pictures of your life with your thumb over the camera lens. You know you don’t like the pictures you’re getting. They’re depressing or irritating and I’ll bet that your response to the pictures is starting to get on the nerves of someone around you.
Ask yourself what is going on around you in life and what it means. Before you say that you don’t know, or you don’t think that deeply about things, I want to assure you that you ALWAYS have some working theory about what EVERYTHING around you means. The footsteps in the hall mean your friend is walking to the kitchen. The remark your coworker made means he doesn’t like his job and feels trapped. Meaning making is a standard feature on brains and none leave the factory without it. The vast majority of this meaning making is outside of our awareness, thankfully. Only the really puzzling events get passed on to our conscious consideration. And even then, they are offered in the form of, “Here’s what I think it means. Can you rule this out?” You only really think about the footsteps in the hall if they seem unsteady, or too fast, or too heavy. Then your mind offers, “Hey, there might be something wrong. Can you go check that out so we know what it really means?”
So, before you start trying to take an inventory of what EVERYTHING means, let me narrow it down a little for you. Think about events that seem to mean something depressing about 1. yourself, 2. the future, and 3. the way the world works. Yes, those things. Depressing, aren’t they? Unless… they don’t really mean what you think they mean.
You know that part about how the vast majority of meaning making takes place outside of our awareness? Well, there is a downside. The meaning manufacturing department in your brain might need an outside consultant from time to time. Yes, it has always been a very productive department, but the quality control has been very poor. It’s always been a balancing act between efficiency and accuracy. The department went a little overboard when they made up those rubber stamps that said, “My life is ruined.” and “Things will never change.” and “Just my luck!” and “Today doesn’t matter.” It seems like they’ve been stamping those meanings on almost every disappointing event that came through the door.
Your employee training program of leaving Bibles in the break room really hasn’t worked. Sure, the truth about you, and the future, and how the world works, is in there. Maybe you’ll have to unpack it a little for them and remind them how much damage it does to be careless with meaning making.
Start tracking down the mistakes and plan on spending some energy keeping an eye on the whole process for a while. It will take some time to turn the department around. It won’t do you any good to get angry and fire them. This is a family business and you’ll only be hurting people you love and need.
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Dr. David Hamilton is a clinical psychologist at the Christian Counseling Center of West Michigan
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Guest Author
Does this mean what I think it means? That just because I think something means something doesn’t make me right about what it means?
I have a few rubber stamps I should go out and destroy right now.
You know what I mean?
If you mean what I think you mean, I think you’re right. I mean it. Not to be mean…
I never thought of things like that. I’m thinking that my balancing act between efficiency and accuracy is neither efficient nor accurate. My rubber stamp is so worn out from overuse and compulsive worrying I thought I should donate it to the Smithsonian. Maybe I should throw it in the trash and start writing by hand . . . in a good way.
But those rubber stamps are so quick and easy, Patrick! Maybe you could just get some more accurate rubber stamps.
For anyone who is going through a time of depression or just a hard time this song is amazing! … if you are struggling, the words to this song speaks so loud! I was having an extremely bad week and I was so down I wasn’t even going to go to church… but one of the pastors called me Saturday and asked me to listen to this song and asked if I could pull it off and sing it for the service the next day … I told him I wasn’t in the mood and probalby not… after I listened to it i cried and kept reading the words over and over again…. how could I not share such a beautiful song… so I called him, said yes and pulled a late night with the band. God is so amazing how he can use music and the truth of HIS words to heal a broken soul. I truly needed to hear this song and sharing it was extremely healing! I hope you have the chance to listen to this beautiful song:) Pass it on to anyone you know is struggling with depression or a heartache…. I hope it speaks to you as much as it did to me:) Just click the link below to listen:)
This is a great song. My kids and I sing this together every time it comes on the radio. Thanks for sharing this, ~L.
Thanks for this post! I needed this. It’s been a rough couple of weeks. Any advice on some ways that help through times of depression for people.
Jaylyn; Music:) just saying:)
Pingback: reBlog from Patrick: Tired, depressed, or just don’t feel like it? « ~L
I have been battling another bout of depression, anxiety, and feeling overwhelmed. I have made it through this before and will again with God’s help. I however have found that I need a support sytem also. Unfortunately I don’t have one right now and as a single mother that is extremely diffucult. Any great words of advice would be greatly appreciated.
:( Cara, Fist thanks for visiting my blog and all your nice comments! I am glad you found this blog… I think that the posts here will help you. I was a single mom for 5 years and it is hard:( I wish I was could give you advice… but it is myself who is searching for it as well. Positive music helps me! I love Hillsong(look them up on youtube) :) If you are in need of an ear try to find a good counselor in your area. Start a blog and talk about your feelings… it has helped me a little… I have found a few very encouraging people. We all need encouragement! I will pray for you, Cara… hang in there and know that you are loved by your child and God! Love is a powerful thing… soak it up:)
I have never been depressed, but my mom has been struggling with it for awhile now. I don’t know how to help her. I got this blog from some other site… I think reading about why other people are depressed helps me understand a bit. Good article. And I want to bye that song of of itunes that someone posted. I think my mom will like it. I’m not a spiritual person but the words make it see worth trying.
thanx,
JT
JT – How caring of you to read about depression so you can try and help your Mom! Just letting her know you love her and you care will help her – even though you might not see any improvement. Your Mom might appreciate gentle encouragement. If you live in the West Michigan area, you might think about contacting the Christian Counseling Center. I’ve been working with the doctor who wrote this article and he has been very helpful. I’ll pray for you & your Mom.
You always seem to find these beautiful songs, L. They speak right to my heart.