The Other 167 Hours

life outside the session

Archive for the month “December, 2009”

22 Dec 2009
1 Comment

It’s not like I need it.

How’s that get-o-meter working? You know, that thing that measures how much you are getting from your spouse, church, job, friends, children, relatives, the “Relationship”… You know that thing you check every now and then just to make sure you’re not being taken advantage of? …just before you say,”All I do is give, give, give and never get anything back!”

Yeah, that thing. You better make sure it’s handy because Christmas is just a few days away and you would hate to be caught without it! Things might not be fair. You might be asked to do something for someone who hasn’t really carried their fair share. I mean, fair is fair! Right? Come to think of it, Christmas seems to be the time when many of us got our first get-o-meter as a child. (Ooh, that means mine is getting pretty old.) Yours is still working fine, just like when you where a child? Isn’t it? Exactly like when you were a child? Read more…

Posted by 167hours in personal growth and tagged , , , , , , , ,
17 Dec 2009
8 Comments

At least believe me!

When someone close tells us something that evokes uncomfortable feelings, it can be very easy to convey “that just couldn’t be!” Now, if they have told you that a conspiracy is underway to personally target your trash bags so that they always rip open just as you are taking them across the carpet, then… okay. But when your spouse is telling you something about herself, for example, how disappointed she was that you didn’t notice her new hair style… no.

“That can’t be! You knew how tired I was last night. That’s crazy!” or a similar statement by you, could almost be misconstrued to be saying that what she said  is crazy and couldn’t be true.. to the casual observer.

As this type of interaction is repeated over time, your spouse will feel the frustration of not being believed. Then the ground is all prepared for resentment, confusion, or an emotional cut off. Read more…

Posted by 167hours in Communication, Relationships and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , ,
14 Dec 2009
3 Comments

How easy is it to overlook beauty?

How easy is it to overlook beauty? Pretty easy, apparently.

The Washington Post, along with a world-famous violinist and his $3.5 million violin, decided to find out.

You can read the complete Washington Post article with video here. Or, if you are in a hurry, you can read a summary here.

What have you overlooked today?

Posted by 167hours in Depression, personal growth
10 Dec 2009
1 Comment

Is it still cool to be busy?

I few years ago I was at a conference where a psychologist was reporting her research on the idea of a Sabbath. I don’t remember her name or much else from the presentation but I remember her saying that in America the only Sabbath we believe in is cancer. She meant that we are very particular about what we count as a socially acceptable reason for doing nothing, and cancer is one of the very few remaining. During tight economic times, it may be especially difficult to justify a day of rest. Read more…

Posted by 167hours in personal growth and tagged , , , , , , , , , ,
09 Dec 2009
2 Comments

Are you sure that’s on the table?

You’re in a competition, a heated discussion, an argument…

Somewhere, deep inside, you have an idea of what’s really being debated, what’s really on the table. What will be won or lost? Pride, bragging rights, your job, your marriage, money?

How about that job interview? What is really on the table? What does it feel like is on the table? Is it your personal value, your professional value, God’s blessing on your life, your economic future, the approval of a parent, the chance to change jobs, the chance to get this particular job at this particular time?

How about that argument with your spouse? What does it feel like is up for debate? The love of your spouse, your marriage, your pride, your free time, your independence?

Read more…

Posted by 167hours in Relationships and tagged , , , , , , , , ,
07 Dec 2009
14 Comments

The Pain of Knowing

I often work with people who are trying to find the courage to know what they know.

Imagine standing in front of a wall that you are about to paint. You look at it and decide that red would be a perfect color for the wall, and you’re right. It would be.

You have a paintbrush in your hand. Next to you is a step ladder with an open bucket of paint on top. You reach up and dip your paintbrush into the bucket.

But, something’s wrong!

Your paintbrush comes out yellow. That bucket is full of yellow paint! Yellow is definitely not the right color for this wall.

Read more…

Posted by 167hours in Emotions in the Bible, Grief and Loss and tagged , , , , ,
03 Dec 2009
2 Comments

More Emotions of Fatherhood

Do I have what it takes? That’s the question that John Eldredge suggests every boy is asking as he grows up. It got me thinking about boys and fatherhood and the emotions of fatherhood. Read more…

Posted by 167hours in Parenting and tagged , , , , , , ,
01 Dec 2009
6 Comments

Life by the Slice

Biting off more than you can chew can be messy and embarrassing and certainly takes some of the joy out of eating. There is one built-in limit that partially protects us from taking a bite too big:  we can only open our mouths so wide. I wouldn’t advise letting that be your only guide, but for the sake of children everywhere I’m glad we at least have that. And, since almost all of us have learned the lesson early in life we should feel free to apply it wherever it may be helpful… figuratively, I mean.

Read more…

Posted by 167hours in Depression, Fear and Anxiety and tagged , , , , , , , ,

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